Prove them wrong

Four years ago I moved to the Midwest from the East coast. Against all of the warnings that I wouldn’t make it by myself, I thrived. I made friends, I landed a wonderful full time job, and most importantly I found my partner and had my son. When things got hard, I was told to come home. I politely declined the offer.

Now, four years later, I have decided to move in with my parents. Not because I need them, but because they need me. Everyone is warning me that I will hate it and that I need to do what’s best for my family.

Well I am. I am doing what is best for my family.

My parents raised four children and did an unbelievable job. They did everything they could for their children. They have been married for 37 years. However, life is swallowing them whole. Despite all of the warnings, I know this is what I need to do.

I want my son to know kindness. I want my son to see what it means to love. I want my son to know that if you love someone, you take care of them no matter what.

I proved everyone wrong when I moved to the Midwest and now I will prove everyone wrong again. Because I live with my decisions and if someone else makes my decisions for me, well I would never be able to live with that.

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We write to translate feelings into words

I know you all have had an off day and you have so many things you need to write, yet you’re staring at a bright computer screen completely blank. You type the beginning of about four lousy sentences and delete each of them thinking “I’m making zero sense.”

It’s frustrating. You have so much to say, yet nothing is coming to mind. That is our job as writers, if you think about it. We have to put these feelings that everyone feels into words, which not everyone is capable of.

That’s why I write; to try & give clarity to those who don’t know what they are feeling. That’s why we all read; to understand that we aren’t alone in these feelings. We need those moments where we go “YES. I’ve been thinking/feeling this and I haven’t been able to convey it! But this writer nailed it!”

So when you are having difficulty conveying your feelings or ideas, take a deep breath.  This is what we write for and when you finally get it right, it will be the best feeling in the world. Not only for you, but for those people who genuinely thank you for giving them clarity.

Fear of being rejected

I am six days shy of having this blog for a month. It has done way better than I anticipated. That’s the problem. I know you’re thinking, “that’s the best problem I’ve ever heard & you’re kind of annoying.”

I have always had a very backwards way of thinking. The more I have, the more I can lose. I see my stats going up every day and it genuinely gives me anxiety. The pressure is on to put out good, valuable information.

I see it as the more viewers I get, the more hate I will get. I, personally, have been struggling with the idea of being rejected – sob story, I know. I believe that is one of my greatest and dumbest fears. I have removed promoting my blog on my Facebook, due to being afraid of being rejected by people I know personally. Honestly, I find that pathetic.

So just an encouraging word to myself and to writers who feel the same: fuck ’em.

 

Doubting your writing

As a writer, it is extremely hard to consistently post work… that’s actually worth a second look. What is even harder is trusting your instinct.

I have read posts about how to have a successful blog. Some said don’t post everyday, because you are wasting your breath on a piece that no one will read. That, personally, just doesn’t make sense to me and it goes against what I feel is right for me. They also say stay with a certain theme, which I understand to an extent. Why do we have to follow guidelines as a creative writer?

My point is, is that we, as writers, have to trust ourselves. We know what we are capable of. We should write about what we want to write about, because that is when our passion shows through our work. That is when we can truly reach out to our audience.

Anyone who has been a great success and has stood out in history has gone against the grain. They did what everyone said was impossible. They were different; they knew what they were capable of when no one else did. Be yourself, do what you feel passionate about, and your audience will find you.